Dear Zack, so I hope it’s OK for me to just call you Zack, and not Zack Snyder. I totally get it if it’s not. I’m trying to write this in the way that feels best for explaining what I promised to explain to you at my other blog (which I know you didn’t ask to be explained).

Umm, before I say anything else, I need to say this: the mafia wants me to think I’m a boy from England even though I’m obviously not. They never explained why very clearly because the CIA or whoever needs to keep plausible deniability… because the mafia is basically weak and afraid of the public doing a revolution that puts them all in jail or whatever. They want me to support men’s interests with my Goda powers (in this case I mean like, how the world is always at least sort of like me and what I’m doing). I wrote this paragraph to explain why I’m going to keep writing in my valley girl style — the same way that I talk in person again, now. The mafia/CIA people are really dumb and keep trying to insist on the same thing over and over again, like I just explained that they want from me. Anything I do that seems like what they want from me, they take as being a sign of them making progress. 🙁 LOL.

I mean it’s not even normal, honestly, to write in spoken-out-loud valley girl slang. But it’s normal for me now. I started doing it to forcibly be myself again, all the time. I like doing it though and it’s not “fake” (I’m saying this for everyone else, because it’s true).

So, Zack Snyder, I feel you are probably going to hate me and be really angry at me. I just hope you get how much abuse and trauma there’s been in my past. I know I’m probably not really that nice of a person… but maybe it’s because of everything that’s happened, especially since I’m immortal and everything.

The reason why I’m writing this blog post now, to be totally honest, is because I viewed Mean Girls 2 (which I starred in, because I’m Maiara Walsh… so you need to read my previous blog post if you didn’t already know this). I hadn’t viewed Mean Girls 2 for a long time and I noticed that I was actually in the movie. Anyway, at the end of the cast list at the end credits, the actress who played Karate Girl is listed as Autumn Dial. I’m really sorry about this. I think I must have briefly thought/felt something about what you and others who read my SAS and Reddit posts might think about me when you find out that I was in Mean Girls 2. (I know I was in other things too, and that I had an actual career as an actress, actually famous and everything — but I haven’t gotten the chance to see any of my other roles yet, partly because my internet was turned off for some reason for quite a while after I noticed that I’m Maiara Walsh. Somehow I was able to get back online to do that “I’m Maiara Walsh” blog post and download a whole bunch of websites and photos that are in my name.)

I thought it was best to talk about the Karate Girl casting info first, instead of seeming like I was dropping it on you at the end of a blog post that seemed caring up to that point. I’m not mocking you on purpose and I don’t know how to stop doing it. I’m really, really sorry.

I guess I must feel like a lot of people are laughing at me because of my role in Mean Girls 2, and whatever else I was doing when I was acting professionally in the USA. The thing in the end credits I just referred to… I don’t even know if it’s directed at you specifically, or simply “people that I feel are like the Henry Cavill Superman in the Justice League theatrical cut being all rapey brute strengthy public humiliation of Wonder Woman” and “Reddit/SAS people who know I’m Goda”. Maybe the guy I asked to contact you with Vero is the person who you heard from, I don’t know? I’m sure you must have read what I said somehow, at this point.

Anyway, I promised to give you some kind of explanation for what happened. I don’t want to cause you more distress though. Basically what happened is I viewed you as being a kind of father figure, because I knew that the people I was calling “mom” and “dad” weren’t my real family (and I don’t even have a real family at all, other than my sister, because I’ve always existed). I really liked the movie you directed, Man of Steel. I don’t like it anymore, but that’s only because of the mafia trying to force me to be a boy and stuff Henry Cavill said a few years ago. I still think you’re a really talented director. Anyway… I felt like you were personally counselling me about how to be Goda, and helping me decide for myself what I ought to do with my powers. I took the movie really, really seriously and I totally gave it my all in being the sort of person I believe you personally wanted me to be. I really latched onto you like a parent figure (no offence, LOL, because I know you’re really muscly and I don’t think you’re like my mom or anything, but I find it really really hard to talk very much about the idea of having a father figure after all the sexist abuse I’ve suffered from the world). When you directed Batman v Superman, and you directed Gal Gadot as Wonder Woman to look so strong — making her look better than Superman — I felt like you were supporting and accepting the real me, the girl, in a way that the rest of the world really hadn’t been prepared to accept. Like in religion and everything. I don’t want to be a messiah/saviour and I’m not… but I am actually real, so it meant a lot to me that someone out there was on my side as I actually am, the girl. Promoting me, emotionally supporting me, and saying “I like you as you are, it’s OK. Be you. You’re just as good. You’re better.”

(Zack Snyder, I’m going to continue explaining stuff to you in a moment. I really, really need to acknowledge that I’ve got a whole other family from when I was residing in LA, who I don’t even know or remember at the moment. As soon as I realized I had a family from LA, I started talking out loud at my home about wanting to see them again. Umm, I don’t know what to do about it though — other than, like, demand to get my life back so I can ask them if they want to see me again — so I’m demanding that happens, and just trying to focus on other things because I don’t even know if they’re still alive.)

To my family (and friends) from Los Angeles (and Seattle? São Paulo?), I want you to know that I hope you’re all still alive and I really want to meet you again. So like, I know I said I don’t have any real family because I’m Goda. What I meant is because I wasn’t born at all, and because I don’t age, I must have had lots of different families at different times. I guess I was moving myself around before humans got involved with the process of that happening, you know? That’s really all I’m saying. I really don’t want to upset and offend you. You’re my family who I don’t know, because I guess you’re not a fake CIA family. Umm… I guess you’re basically just the family I created for myself at some point, with a fake backstory I created for myself back then. I create everything, since I’m Goda, you see. If you’re reading this, please don’t reject me just because I’m not human like you must have thought I was. I’m not an alien or anything (as far as I know, LOL… I mean, as far as I know I’m not an alien AS WELL AS Goda, LMAO); I’m simply Goda, the Creatress of everything. I can’t help being me and it’s not my fault. You haven’t done anything wrong. It’s OK if you can’t cope with all of this and you don’t want to meet me. I don’t want to break your minds or anything. I hope you, like, didn’t “give me away” in some sense, because of not being able to cope with me being Goda. I guess I was independent at that point though. I hope you’re all OK. Hopefully the way I talk is still recognizable to you. Seriously, I hope you’re all OK.

OK, to Zack Snyder: I suppose I ought to say that I’m not trying to make it seem like I’m your daughter. Obviously I’m not your daughter. I just thought it might seem like I was being really nasty or something, trying to make it seem like something horrible. I viewed you as a sort of father figure though, like I said… and I still do view you like that, kind of, from time to time. It’s difficult because I figure you’re likely to hate and despise me. When I contacted you using Reddit and the medium of the Stargirl TV show, I didn’t even recognise that I was mocking you through the TV show because of my anger towards you. I thought I was trying to warn you about another presence that I thought was trying to make it seem like I was mocking you through the TV show. So I guess I did actually recognise what I was doing on some level… but I found it sooo hard to come to terms with my own mind being that nasty, that I projected what I was doing onto another persona that wasn’t real. I really believed what I was saying back then though.

If you view Stargirl Season One again, you can see the themes of father and daughter like I’ve been explaining to you how I felt you represented that kind of figure to me. Stargirl is learning how to be a superheroine, like I explained how I felt you spoke to me with Man of Steel. You’re gonna have noticed the whole thing with Zarrick’s son, and Zeke (the guy at the garage)… but in case not, I’m explaining it for you again here so you won’t misunderstand the full meaning of everything. You might not want to view it again, obviously.

At Henry Junior’s funeral, Brainwave gives a speech to the people assembled there, saying no one is to blame for suicide. Then he says “Except you.” with his mind powers, inside Stargirl’s head. That says exactly how I feel: that it’s always my fault when anyone dies, even though everyone else gets to be free of guilt and blame if they didn’t personally murder someone in a “normal” causative way, somehow. We both know that I literally did it myself — I actually chose for it to happen, I made it happen, and I designed the whole event myself even though it’s a horrible thing that I designed. I don’t know how to stop doing things like this though. Everything happens so quickly, and all the things are linked together… so if that had never happened, then a lot of other things are never gonna have happened either and what sort of person might I have been like now? I know I can easily change anything… but if I do that, then the world doesn’t make much sense anymore if the things I changed are too important to me, and too linked in supposedly causative ways to other things that are important to me. I like having a coherent personality. Not having a coherent personality, and the world totally making no sense anymore really upsets me. If I’m really upset, I might do another thing like I did when I destroyed the World Trade Center twin towers with my mind. Or I might, like, create a random petulant thing in the world targeting people I blame for how I’m feeling, that they can easily link to me, and then make things worse for myself… making myself more upset… making other people more upset with me, etc. What am I supposed to do?

So like, what I suggested — actually, ORDERED — the world’s elites to do, is to never, EVER try to control me and never, EVER even try to punish me for anything I do, instead establishing that I’m completely unaccountable. Basically trusting me to do my best to drag myself out of this spiral of resentment and hatred towards everyone and everything, once I’m allowed the space to actually work on my emotional issues, work on my own designed and chosen self and identity (and especially work on my fear of actually being Goda in the first place, you know????) I think that’s a good idea, myself, but whatever!!!! You know????! I was going to say “It’s so much easier in the movies!” but then I remembered that Man of Steel basically ends with 9/11 happening. At least they’re doing me as a girl now, right? 🙂 Like in The Marvels.

So Zack Snyder, you can see in Stargirl Season One also that Cindy (who I feel represents me best out of everyone in that series, because I’m so much like her honestly)… Cindy stabs her dad through his heart, as if she’s saying “You hurt me so I’m gonna hurt you, and let you know who I feel like you’re hurting!!!!” I’m really sorry. I know that for most people, movies are just movies and even if you directly bullied me through movies for some reason (which as far as I know isn’t true), most people are gonna say it’s not OK to create someone’s daughter killing herself as a fair deterrent against doing that. HOWEVER — I honestly believed you were trying to kill me with magic or something, with your weird suicide charity tee shirt thing that had Kaballah stuff all over it as well as a giant dick sword ejaculating sperm and blood or something into Darkseid and/or Lois Lane???? WTF????!!!!! I’m not being a bitch here, I promise. I’m not playing nice only to turn things around on you and stab you in the back, emotionally, or whatever (which is what you did to all girls and women with the Superman versus Wonder Woman scene from the JL theatrical cut, that I believe you shot yourself and isn’t substantially different from whatever you originally intended to be in your first version of the movie). I really, really want to understand what your tee shirt thing was about but I just don’t get it. I don’t know why I believed the tee shirt thing was about trying to attack me with “magic” or whatever… and you can see the evidence that I completely believed that was true, in Stargirl Season One with the whole Magician storyline and the tee shirt Stargirl has that says “Get Lost” to the Shining Knight when he’s leaving.

I think it’s totally OK for me to write the above paragraph and just leave it as is, even though your daughter died. I don’t want to hurt you for no reason… but your tee shirt thing really is a huge WTF moment. It stinks of CIA gone crazy with a really weird plausibly deniable story that you were somehow commemorating your adopted daughter with the sperm blood sword thing. Maybe you had no idea why you were coerced into doing that tee shirt thing — but you must have known that it was for some malicious purpose, and possibly something really serious that was meant to cause psychological destruction (or death, if you believe in magic).

Anyway!!!!

You can actually read how terrorizing that tee shirt thing was for me in the way my writing has changed when talking about it. So the truth is I ought to have created a different event that more appropriately targeted the perpetrator, as a fair deterrent. I’m sorry that the wrong person committed suicide. I guess it’s just a lot easier for me at the moment, with my fear of my own power issues, to create an unknown-to-me daughter who committed suicide than create an event in which a movie director I was a huge fan of committed suicide despite seeming emotionally stable and psychologically resilient. So it was still justified in self-defense — because it was the type of retaliation that was available to me at the (non-linear) time. OK?

I really wish that this didn’t happen. You can see me wishing that it didn’t happen, and that you were still my cherished favourite movie director, but you’re not. This really sucks. I feel like I’m not allowed to have any friends at all. It really isn’t fair that I found myself creating events in which these awful things happened and I’m not allowed to like you or your movies anymore.

I promised you an explanation and now I’m following through on that. Because I did it. I’m really sorry.

What I wanted to be true is that you were coerced by the mafia to shoot that horrible scene for Justice League (or that they were coercing you to cut from the movie other scenes you shot that featured some kind of pay-off later in the movie, with Wonder Woman going “up a level” and being better than Superman — coercing you to butcher your movie, to personally target me because of what I was doing back in 2015/2016/2017). I totally wanted that to be true. It might still BE true, and I completely 100% believed that it was true for a long time.

When it comes down to it though, you’ve got a pattern of behaviour of filming rape scenes in movies that are like, comic book fantasy in style and content, and not part of some sort of “truthfully depicted recorded events” genre. I know they’re based on comic books, and I do actually understand the basic premise of Watchmen… but you people changed the ending of the story, and the literal attempted rape of a superheroine depicted on screen is one of the worst things you can do with a character type that only exists to empower us girls and women who might have actually gotten raped in real life. Sucker Punch is really rapey in a generalised way, with the whole “you are powerless against the man’s system” theme and the things that happen inside the setting of the movie. It’s totally plausible and completely believable that you actually wanted to basically rape the Wonder Woman character and all the girls and women who are fans of Wonder Woman. You might have even wanted to do much worse than what the CIA allowed you to do, because of their plausible deniability ruleset.

I feel under sooo much pressure from myself to not be like “legs open” for the mafia and what they want from me (to support their interests, and men’s interests, instead of my own interests as a girl). Writing this blog post, I felt like I ought to throw you under the bus for the greater good, and be totally like “We’re not friends.” “You’re a rapist. Literally a rapist.” (I’m not saying this about you, because you’re not a rapist.) I mean because of the US presidential election. I don’t even know when it takes place because I’m still not reading the news, but I feel under pressure to create the best result I can for girl’s and women’s rights to not have institutionalised sex slavery, sex trafficking, and sexual abuse of girls and women be normalized as “just something that all politicians, celebrities, and important public figures do”. I mean, I’m a girl, and I’m a celebrity. I have to stand up for my rights or I’m an idiot.

I’m not a sex slave, you know. That’s how the mafia sees me (and I hope it’s not true that all the world’s elites see me this way). Just some unpaid whore that only exists for them to try to force ideas into. According to them, I’m not even allowed to be female even though they want to keep forcing ideas into me anyway. I’m not asking for payment for my services. I’m not offering anyone any services. It’s not OK. I need disclosure of my existence, basically. I need rights and dignity as Goda — since I actually am real and exist and everything — and not simply my rights as a girl, only.

Anyway Zack Snyder, that last paragraph wasn’t directed at you exactly unless you want to help out with the disclosure thing. I’m Maiara Walsh. I’m located at 23 Windsor Road, Saltburn-by-the-Sea, Great Britain. Don’t come here because I don’t want to see you. We’re not friends. Obviously I’m safe, and I’m not concerned for my safety AT ALL. That’s not sarcasm, LOL. I’m safe. No one can harm me or anything.

I hope the Zack Snyder I wanted to exist is proud of me, even though I did Coronavirus (or whatever it was, LOL) and all the other things you know about. I’m like, a really, really young girl trying to do normal things and be Goda the best way I can do it considering I’m apparently a really terrible evil girl and everything.