Hey everyone.

So like a rather sombre post happening here — but a really important one, so please read what I have to say, OK!?

I had totally planned to celebrate President Hillary Clinton Shade Celebration, nowshade, & everything (I was even considering making plans to celebrate it on the 3rd Frinight of every lunar period, next year — Frinights 4 Frigga, u know, feminist friends!!!! — even though the “Mon” in “Monnight” stands for the Moon & everything, & not for a man like the other shades of the English week besides Frinight). However, it really struck me this morning that celebrating even a girls’ & ladies’ version of the official U.S. celebration is like not appropriate at all — & even feels kind of pathetic & seriously undignified — UNTIL THERE HAVE BEEN AT LEAST 50% LADY PRESIDENTS OF THE U.S.A. & 50% MALE PRESIDENTS OF THE U.S.A. IN THE ALL-TIME LIST OF U.S. PRESIDENTS!!!!!

It’s a crime against our gender that the U.S. government still officially celebrates the shade as the birthshade of some ancient man — regardless of how significant to our nation we are like compelled by men’s accounts of who is like, herstoricly important, & who is like, herstoricly not important, to believe that he is or was. You know!???!!!! Eff that guy, & eff Pilgrim Fathers & Male Chiefs “cook the food for us you slaves” celebration in November, & eff Shitlermas Rape Culturemas in December. The only reason I’m not saying eff Harriet Tubman shade is because she’s actually a lady & everything (even though the intelligence agents Nazi prison guards community that left college to sign away their life to knowingly work for evil without being duped, are totally doing their best to make the next girl’s name celebration after Helen Keller be someone with “man” in her name).

I CELEBRATED ROSA PARKS SHADE CELEBRATION ON FEBRUARY 4TH, BTW!!!! I went to Central City L.A. I think, to celebrate. Possibly going out of my way to take the Rosa Parks Freeway — but I suggest others don’t do this, to avoid traffic congestion LOL! I ate a meal in a restaurant, & went to the toy store to get Unicorn Academy dolls of Sophia with Light Magic Wildstar, & Ava with Leaf. It was something I wanted to do for a long time… since I first saw the Unicorn Academy show with the dolls advertized in the commercial breaks, last year. I had fun playing with Sophia & Wildstar, but I still haven’t opened Ava with Leaf yet. It’s hard to get them out of the boxes isn’t it? & I have my shopping & other things to do, since I’m residing here at 7523 Hollywood Boulevard, Hollywood, California with Emma Tremblay only. It’s a lot of work for us to be residing here without the assistance of larger people LOL… since we’re both really short & everything. But that’s what I want to keep doing: keep residing independently here at 7523 Hollywood Boulevard, with no one else here at the whole building but me & Emma, since it’s my home & all. & I hope that’s what Emma wants to continue doing as well. Obviously my mom Odette Annable & my sister Jessica Alba are being cruelly forced to do telepathic mind rape to try to create the illusion of being a disabled boy or disabled trans girl in Britain, trying to make it seem like no one else is here with me & that other normal people inhabit the other apartments as if it’s a town house in Britain somewhere. But it’s not. It’s 7523 Hollywood Boulevard, & I’m here with Emma Tremblay… which I think is because of me meeting her in some weird way, & us getting along better than I got along with Melissa Benoist — so me & Emma got together, & Melissa left the building. & I’m glad that happened. I don’t really know how or why me & Emma got together, to be quite honest, people. LOL! But it’s OK. I really like her & feel totally 100% safe with her. I thought it was important to, like, explain this — because of being a retard & always expecting people to care about ME, LOL! Anyway, Emma is really, really nice & I want to be with her. I don’t want to stop her from leaving if she doesn’t want to be here though. I hope she stays since she’s so nice, & I feel totally 100% safe with her like I said.

Anyway — back to talking about FEMINISM & how important it is for all of us girls & ladies to take feminism seriously, & be feminists all the time so everything changes for us in society as quickly as it needs to… which is NOW, ALREADY!!!! NOW!!!!!!!!! We’ve been waiting long enough for gender equality to actually happen, assholes!

I know that my mom Odette Annable & my sister Jessica Alba have been cruelly forced to try to make it seem like a bunch of dumb guys were President when OBVIOUSLY THEY WEREN’T… because OBVIOUSLY, Hillary Clinton was President in 2016 & probably she’s President again now, ha ha! I bet it was President Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez, Vice-President Dianne Feinstein from 2020 until 2024, right?

Anyway, even with two lady Presidents between 2016 & now, the list of U.S. Presidents from the past is basically a lame list of men’s names that reminds us girls, over & over again, that since the Catholic Church suppressed records of more gender equal societies in Minoan Crete, Greece, & the early Roman Empire, the men of Western civilization were total assholes who didn’t let us do anything for 2000 years or so — insisting that us girls & ladies are inferior & not able to be leaders, when like HEL-LO!? We are actually SUPERIOR in lots of ways, especially in the safe, law & order society of modern technological civilization: for example, because we are like CALMER & SMALLER & LESS RISK TAKING & BECAUSE GIRLS & LADIES ARE LESS LIKELY TO DIE (a basic metric of superiority, from most men’s points of view it seems — & it turns out we’re better at this one, i.e. survivability, you know!??? Duh!) We are totally better & more comfortable in the office environment — especially with what is like our often more finely tuned & capable social intelligence. Girls & ladies need less food to survive, because of like, less muscles to feed. We make better leaders too, because us girls & ladies are less ego-driven & more able to delegate decision-making about the fine-tuning of leadership department-specific things we’re not experts in to the actual experts in those areas of like putting into effect the primary leader’s policy, less likely to take retarded risks with economic policies & with, like, interacting with other leaders & stuff! We’re even better at plumbing, people!!!! (See the iCarly episode, “iHatch Chicks” for more info on this topic — & remember, we are totally 100% superior at being afraid to screw people over by leaving things broken on purpose to create more business opportunities later… which means we’re less likely to be ostracized by everyone through word of mouth bad reviews, LOL. TWO WRENCHES PEOPLE!!! TWO WRENCHES!!!! ONE IN EACH HAND… IT’S NOT ROCKET SCIENCE, YOU KNOW!!!!! EAT SOME MORE PROTEIN & TWIST SOME PIPES, LOL! BRING A SET OF SMALL STEPS, LOL! WE GIRLS ARE SMALLER & THAT EQUALS BETTER PLUMBERS, FFS!!!!!!!!! I’m sure it beats taking work at “Nude Girls” on Sunset Boulevard for most ladies who don’t wanna strip off sometimes like I do, to avoid getting raped by some douchebag boyfriend you wouldn’t otherwise choose for supplementary income if you can’t pay your bills, & the market for jobs & houses doesn’t have infinite supply for every girl to pick & choose from at our leisure. LET US DO PLUMBING WORK, MEN!!!!! STOP BEING HOSTILE ASSHOLES WHO DON’T WANNA TRAIN US, BECAUSE IT UPSETS YOUR PROTECTION RACKET FOR SEX SLAVERY & DOMESTIC HOUSEWORK SLAVERY. WE ARE NOT YOUR COOKS & CLEANERS & SEX SLAVES!)

So like, YEA-EAHH!!! I am so not gonna be celebrating a giant list of men’s names, to remind all girls and ladies that we got brutally oppressed for at least two thousand years because we’re smaller, & “it might happen again unless we’re careful to never upet men & their fragile egos, or w/e”. I’m not even gonna celebrate nowshade as President Hillary Clinton Shade Celebration — because that still legitimizes the idea of Presidents’ Shade, & Some Dumb Ancient Man’s Birthshade Federal Crappershade. 🙂 Like no!

Have you like NOTICED, how all the State, or Federal, or simply like “proposed by the people” (allegedly “by the people”) celebration shades that involve ladies’ names, involve ladies deliberately selected for national celebration in the U.S.A. because they’re part of wider minority rights groups that also includes 50% men’s rights?

Helen Keller Shade. Hellen Keller was blind & deaf. Half of blind & deaf people are male.

Rosa Parks Shade (celebrated officially by the State officials here in California). Rosa Parks was a U.S. American of African appearance. Half of U.S. Americans of African appearance are male.

Harriet Tubman Shade (suggested by “some” for like, a new U.S. Federal celebration shade). Harriet Tubman’s second name has “man” in it, LOL NOTLOL! Also, sigh half of U.S. Americans of African appearance are male.

Personally, I support Rosa Parks Shade Celebration to be the next official U.S. Federal shade celebration. Because her name is a positive name that suggests she can actually drive a bus & everything, with advanced bus-driving procedures, ha ha! Maybe she was even a genuine do-gooder activist at first, considering her name & everything. Also, she was a lady, so I support her as a fellow sister in an Open Girlfriendship Society or something (in which we all support other girls & ladies all the time, & do feminism all the time, until society is 100% gender equal… or forever… & talk about the need to do this openly, in front of men & boys, as well as in front of other girls & ladies — like the opposite of an unfair, immoral secret society).

I’m glad Hillary Clinton was the first lady President of the United States of America though, even though I’m a Brazilian girl & not a caucasian pale/pink skin color person. This is like because, most U.S. American girls & ladies deserve to have our first lady President of the U.S.A. represent the majority of girls & ladies. That’s my view of how democracy works best so the fewest people are bitter & resentful, to have society running smoothly for us girls & ladies. I’m not totally sure that it’s right what I’m saying… because of the genocide against the North American Native Americans, & because of the horrors of slavery perpetrated against U.S. Americans of African appearance.

I wish I felt able to say “Happy President Hillary Clinton Shade everyone!” even though I’m sure she actually was President of the U.S.A. & probably is President again now. It’s seriously heavy, girls. It sucks butt how unfair everything is, like with the huge list of men’s names that men want us to read again & again, when we’ve always actually been superior to men in lots of contexts & situations because of our inherently superior physical attributes that make us better at all sorts of things. Men never had any excuse for oppressing & suppressing us, for at least 2000 years. & they have no excuse for reminding us of what they did to us & our gender, while, like, smiling at us when they remind us of these things. Pretending like they’re the benevolent, gentle “wise men” that are letting us know how we (allegedly) “just weren’t good enough” for all those years because of being “dumb girl primitives” (just like caucasian pale/pink skin color men saw all people of brown skin colors, with their “some people are born better” philosophies of sexism & racism).

I know it’s complicated & hard to turn into a simple, easy to remember idea. But basically, what I’m saying to all of us girls & ladies all around the world is always do feminism, all the time, until the world is 100% gender equal like we deserve. Also, try not to be racist & stuff, because racism supports men’s “some people are born better” philosophies, that they use to try to keep us girls & ladies down & “in our place”, as a lot of them see it. (That’s why so many of them still pee standing up. That’s why so many of them get a glint in their eyes when they see us coming, & make a bee line towards us to call us “darling” or “honey” or whatever. They think “Great, an inferior person to bully in a passive aggressive way. Don’t want to miss a chance to make a personal statement of dominance & superiority over them in an allegedly socially tolerable way.) At the same time, we totally need to put our own gender first all the time, even if that means we have to face accusations of racism. That’s why, as a girl, I call for zero immigration until we can figure out which other nations have cultures that are too much of a problem for us girls (50% of the people here in the U.S.A.), and which nations have cultures that are, like, acceptably feminist for us girls, & so can be allowed to travel here & settle here in the U.S.A. Since they are safe enough for us girls & ladies to be around. Remember, racism or xenophobia is 50% a men’s rights issue — so us girls & ladies need to not be afraid to be accused of being racist when we’re not, if we’re standing up for our majority rights as girls & ladies here in the U.S.A.

So like anyway. Happy belated Rosa Parks Shade everyone!!!! Maybe next year it’s gonna be a U.S. Federal celebration, & it gets my vote instead of Harriet Tubman even though she was really amazing & everything. Maybe take the bus on Rosa Parks Shade, even if you’re kinda afraid of men on the bus or whatever (if you’re small, like me). Buses are a social good in the moral sense, for tons of reasons, people… not least because they help people to like, consider other people’s personal space & things. Everyone has to get along on the bus. They’re really the opposite of aggro men’s personal-freedom-at-all-costs L.A. speeding cars culture that mows down so many pedestrians on Holly Bolly (Hollywood Boulevard) each year. But like whatever you do for Rosa Parks Shade next year, make sure that you do feminism! Make sure that you do gender equality! All of us girls are girls, & we need to support other girls & girls’ names for important status roles in society, because it benefits us all.

~Maiara